filtering time for my amici

1 04 2006





These wise words were uttered by a client’s CIO during an all-hands’ meeting last thursday morning. Words from a very straightforward and pragmatic man. I couldn’t resist writing them down after he said them because they are perfectly applicable to life and how you deal with the people close to you. When a person you treasure hurts you and disappoints you deliberately, numerous times, you demote him/her in your hierarchy of people you love, take him/her out of your system and then move on. Dedicate your time to the people you love and who are willing to love you back and your days to discovering new loves, new people for whom you are willing to start over and take risks again. Make time to share your life with people who are willing to share their lives with you too. Simple but hard to do.


The past few days I realized that I have been using this “filtering mechanism” in how I manage my remaining time with my friends, especially in the office. Since I know my days with them are already numbered, I try to allot my time only to those that I care for the most. It irks me so much when I spend a considerable part of my day doing mindless chatter with individuals who leave me spent and stressed out after a night or lunch of hanging out with them. Net, gemskie and I were having coffee last night and got to discussing how we know which people we would not mind wasting time with and we were able to think of several factors.

1. if that person doesn’t leave us tired after hanging out with them, tired because we were the only ones talking the entire time

2. if while hanging out with that person, we never had to mentally create a line-up of topics just to prevent dead air (it gets so bad sometimes that while you’re talking about something, you are already thinking up new topics in your head!)

3. if after hanging out with that person, we never had to recount the stuff we said and evaluate in retrospect if the person found them offensive though they just didn’t say it

4. if the conversation is free-flowing and if we don’t have to look at our cellphones and wristwatches every 10 or so minutes

5. if we never had the urge to give the person a copy of Reader’s Digest and ask him/her to read it before we go out just so we’d have a, again, line-up of topics for the night

6. if there are always a lot of loud, boisterous laughter involved in the times we are with that person

I am not trying to be mean and sound snooty. I guess it’s just as simple as saying that I cannot jive with everyone all the time. And it’s hard to find people running in the same (insane) wavelength as mine or people who complement the way I think. And life is too short to waste it on inconsequential things hehehe.


anyway, some foodie news. i finally got to eat at AMICI DI DON BOSCO and it was heavenly and orgasmic and all the good chuva you can think of to describe good food. i had dinner and lunch there for two consecutive days, that’s how good the food is. sarap.




One response

17 04 2006
kuya mannix

“Dedicate your time to the people you love and who are willing to love you back”
sandali insan, di ba sabi nga ni kris true love is the one that is unconditional? hehehe

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