yes there is a god[dess ]

19 11 2006

eddie vedder

last thursday i experienced hell, an incredible kind of hell that i, even in extreme anger, would not wish on anyone. but if it was what i needed to go through to appreciate the mind-blowing heaven i came upon that night, then every second was worth it. that night, i came to believe again that heaven is indeed here on earth and it was in the form of a magnificent legendary band called PEARL JAM. the minute i saw eddie vedder in the flesh, all ugly feelings fled my insides, and what remained was this blissful, heady sensation.

this is the kind of experience that gets your heart pumping life all over your weary spirit and transports you to a state where you stop thinking and just literally let yourself hear and feel the songs with every fiber of your being. they played formidable sets and each song seemed to be a document of all the feelings i have been undergoing the past months; disappointment, listlessness, frustration, loneliness, excitement, fear, happiness, resignation, and finally, this desire to endure and plod through the dark moments.

i easily figured out which ones in the audience were my contemporaries by looking to see who would just nod their heads to world wide suicide or yellow ledbetter and then yell with all their might to betterman, black or jeremy.

that night i felt like it was just me in the audience and them onstage. i felt like i was back at home again on a hot summer morning, waking up to eddie’s voice blasting through the karaoke’s gigantic speakers. i did not care if i looked like an overaged grunge fan banging her head to every beat or rhythmn she hears. right in front of me was one of the greatest bands i have ever known, one who survived ailments like sophomore jinx, and bandmates’ egoes, which commonly brought demise to others, so who would bother to care about what other people think in a moment like that?

i saw a husband and a wife with their young son three rows in front of us and it got me thinking that if i had a kid that time, i would have also brought him or her to the gig, because it’s always good to start them young when it comes to great music. so that’s one thing on my list of things to do before i die, bring my first-born to a pearl jam concert while he/she is still under five, or an EHEADS reunion concert even.

pearl jam

after their first set, i texted one of my highschool friends to tell her how magnificent pearl jam was and she reminded me of this naughty idea we had in highschool where we said that eddie would be the man who will have the honor to devirginize my innocent self hahaha. well if he’s reading this then… good on him hahaha. my email’s right over on the corner of the page ;P

**photos courtesy of http//